The Magical Migrant

The following post was published by Council of European Canadians. While the article refers immigrants (and illegal aliens) in Canada, it should be immediately obvious that it applies equally well to America.

I have a confession to make.

I have been known to disparage self-styled environmentalists and counterfeit Green-Leftists for their apparent ignorance of fundamental principles of sustainability, most particularly the crucial role that population growth plays in spurring environmental degradation. But I need to thank them for the lessons that they have taught me in the last three years. I need to credit them for presenting facts that I hadn’t been aware of.

Facts like these:

1. Illegal border-crossers and refugee claimants do not carry or transmit viruses. When Covid struck it was deemed necessary to impose travel restrictions on Canadians. But not so migrants. The government was well justified in denying my constitutional right to travel freely within Canada while turning a blind eye to the illegal border traffic at Roxham Road and elsewhere. Migrants don’t need to be vetted. Viruses know this.
2. Migrants —legal or illegal—don’t have an ecological footprint. They don’t emit GHG gasses, consume non-renewable resources or create sewage or cause pollution. They have a smaller ecological impact than Casper the Friendly Ghost. You can inject 5 million foreign-born consumers into Canada every decade and Mother Nature doesn’t notice a damn thing.
3. Migrants check their culture and tribal mindset at the border. They are blank slates upon which we can write the rights and principles and values that define our nation. And they wouldn’t dream of curbing our most cherished right to speak freely if we criticized their religious dogmas and practices.
4. Migrants don’t impose a net fiscal burden on taxpayers. They pay taxes like everyone else, and from the onset it covers the expense of the medical care, education and public infrastructure construction and maintenance provided to them.
5. Migrants who break the law by coming here illegally [illegal aliens] will be law-abiding once here. They do an ethical 180. And if they are issued a deportation order after their case is heard, they will show up as instructed.
6. Migrants have no impact on the law of supply and demand. By adding to the pool of cheap labour they do not lessen the bargaining power of native born workers. By increasing demand for housing they put no upward pressure on housing prices. By increasing the demand for surgeries and medical treatment they do not lengthen surgery wait times or weight times for attention in the ER.
7. Human beings can’t be illegal. Migrants are human beings. So no migrant is illegal, and  so by definition  there can be no illegal immigration. Get it? Problem solved.

Let’s face it, migrants are magical people. They are the stuff that legends are made of. They defy the laws of physics, and the law of supply and demand. The assimilate seamlessly, adopt our language easily, embrace our customs eagerly, contribute instantly, and pay more in taxes than the cost of the services provided to them as soon as they set foot in the country.

More than that, they are immortal. They are brought here to “support our ageing population” and they will continue to do so because they themselves never age. They will never retire. There will be no need to support them 30 years down the road by importing migrants in even greater numbers. It is a good thing that they never grow old because ; if not, then our current immigration policy would be just a Ponzi scheme, wouldn’t it?

Given these facts, I am dumbfounded that any Canadian would not deify migrants to the extent that the CBC does. Inspirational heart-warming “Immigrant-makes-good “ stories are a staple of CBC news items and presentations. When you see them you feel shame for ever thinking that a sovereign nation has a right to control its borders. You wonder how you could have been so callous as to want to turn any aspiring migrant away. I mean, here you have a Superior Being from afar banging on our door, a supplicant whose only sin is the ambition to work hard to improve our lives by depressing our wages, straining our social safety net, competing for affordable housing and demanding reasonable accommodation to unreasonable demands—-and yet you don’t appreciate him! Don’t you know that neither he or migrants like him will have a negative ecological impact or exacerbate affordable housing shortages or require expensive ESL training or make demands on the grid or increase traffic congestion? He is pure magic.

How then could Canada ever have too many magical people? Surely the sky should be the limit. A Canada of 100 million? Why not?

So what’s your problem xenophobe? Don’t you believe in magic?

Don’t you believe that we can solve the housing crisis by importing 400,000 more home-seekers each year? Don’t you believe that we can alleviate monster surgery wait times by bringing in hundreds of thousands of people who will need hospital care? Don’t you believe that we can meet our climate change commitments by bringing in a half a million climate-changers a year? Don’t you believe that we can stop suburban sprawl and protect green belts by importing hundreds of thousands of wannabe homebuyers and renters every year?

What kind of a Canadian are you anyway? I feel sorry for people like you. The world must be a very dark place. It seems to me that a life without magical thinking is hardly worth living. If I lived that kind of life I wouldn’t be able to find anyone to vote for.